Adíos Los Angeles

August 26-Sept 2, 2010 {Los Angeles, CA}

I have a love/hate thing with Los Angeles. Obviously, there was a time when I loved it. Why else would I have been willing to pack up everything and move there? There are lots of things to love about L.A. The weather. The food. Shopping. Nightlife. Music Scene. City Life in general. I could go on and on.  I met Rob, who as a native Angeleno showed me facets of the city which I might never have seen nor appreciated. For a time, I happily called myself an Angeleno.

Then, the city lost its luster.

I’m not sure if the city lost its luster because my relationship with one of its native sons was falling apart. All I know is that my time in L.A. was tumultuous. There were some highs, but far too many lows. For the last 1.5 years that I lived there, all I could do was plot my escape.

I finally moved from L.A., but I’ve been back several times. Each time I visit, I say a farewell to L.A.

This time I mean business. I won’t be making any trips back to L.A. for a long while. My psyche can’t take it. As I said in my earlier posts, visiting L.A. is emotionally gut-wrenching. Being there is like picking the scab off of a wound that has already begun healing.

I wanted to make this trip count. I made a checklist of things I wanted to do. The list was extensive.

Here some of my list

• Spend time with family and friends.

• Run a race.
I participated in the San Diego Fire Run 4 Mile race

• See a show at the Hollywood Bowl
I saw the Chemical Brother with Chromeo and Yacht

You can see a short clip here. Chemical Brothers at the Hollywood Bowl from Anne K. on Vimeo.

• Go to a few Farmer’s Markets

• Shop. shop. shop
I went to all of my favorites. Melrose. The Grove. Garment District. Old Towne Pasadena.

Tokidoki Store on Melrose

Johnny Cupcakes on Melrose

• Wander downtown and take photos.
• Eat
As someone eloquently put it, I ate my face off while I was in L.A.

Chile Relleños with Carne Asada

Steak Sandwich from Dave's Chillin' N Grillin'

Fish Tacos

Tuna Poke

Yogurtland

Shrimp Tacos

Sourdough Jack

Tacos and Chimichurri Fries from a food truck

Ramen and Gyoza from Daikokuya

Mochi and Rainbow Dango

Macaroons from Bottega Louie

There are countless other meals, but I forgot to photograph them 😦

That’s an overview of my trip.

As I reveled in my favorite things, I was reminded of the things that just didn’t quite go right, of the dreams that never came to fruition, and an overwhelming sense of failure. This is not what I had imagined would become of my career when I arrived in L.A. I would see places that were meaningful to Rob and me and I would be overcome by the sadness of it all. This is not what I had hoped for when I married Rob. So, I would cry. I didn’t think it was possible to cry so much. I’m relieved that I had a great pair of dark sunglasses to hide behind.

While this was painful, it was necessary. I needed this trip to close this chapter of my life.

I have no regrets. I’m ready to move on.

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